Thursday, October 16, 2008

SO-HUM...SO WHAT ???

As aptly as it can be named, it’s an ART OF LEAVING, the marathon sessions are set to conclude in dwindling percentages.

The Gyans from the past few days, for SIMC 2010

1. Do five acts of kindness

The following are mine.

  • I was so kind to my body, that I stopped coming for AOL.
  • I was so kind to my roommate that he stopped talking to me.
  • I was so kind to my tummy, that I stopped eating mess-y food.
  • I was so kind to the dog that I got the anti-rabies injections.
  • I was so kind to my parents, that I may quit SIMC.

  1. Always be happy
  • Don’t do your assignments, and be happy.
  • Pile up and burn the assignments, and be happy.
  • Don’t come to AOL, and so I am the happiest.
  • No more phaltu Gyans, the most irritating part of the special edition of AOL – the SIMC way, with attendance sheet, class tests and assignments, and am happy.

Are you happy, my dear dentist sir?

U r taking my breath out, instead of the teeth!!!

3. Ecological footprints.

Please pardon. We are too busy with Ananya sir's footprints, and trying not to get it embedded in Kochi's seabeds forever. Folklores will get another Mahabali and Vamana in Ananya sir and UKC respectively. Or does it look like Midhun and Ananya sir!!!

Soooooo… hum??? No, no….. soooooooo… what!!!! That’s an attitude.

SO...HUM???

With every SO, I think of the Photoshop assignment, and with every HUM it runs to the Photography assignment.
The next SO transports me to my footprints which is already in turmoil, (Kochi dates changed by the college), and the HUM takes me to Nakhate sir’s assignments.
As I plan to meditate, there comes the next SO like a bolt from the blue… UKC-sir’s assignment, with the HUM looking at the pending PTC.

GIVE US A BREAK SIMC. At least for AOL, keep the attendance sheet out. It’s not part of a syllabus. To be better an individual is by choice, not by brute force.

(For me, I hate GODMEN, YOGI’S & PREACHERS, leave alone going to temples/churches or Mosques, which I rarely do, only to appreciate the architecture. So no offence meant to anyone's beliefs here.)

Breathing not granted - BNG.

Instructor: Done with your assignments?

Midhun: (Wondering on how he knew about the incomplete Photoshop and Photography?)

NO sir, partly done.

I: (All confused). So you took the breath in and didn’t leave it out or vice-versa?

M: (All dazed)

[(in his mind) - Breathing assignments? 10 marks total, 4 for breathing in, 4 for breathing out, and 2 for holding it. If you are dead while holding the breath, lesser insurance]

No sir, as a matter of fact, I didn’t get time to even breathe because I was too busy with the assignments here.

I: Since you didn’t do your breathing, you are chucked out.

M: (Intrapersonally) Idiots!!! If I hadn’t been breathing, I would have been dead by now.

Stress relieving or adding on???

What does the college think with AOL? Part of a syllabus??? Sri Sri SOHUM insists the same to only those who are interested, and that too for a period of 120 minutes maximum at a stretch. But SIMC, as always has the regular rules twisted. Almost 5 hours or say 300 minutes of AOL at a stretch. Is it for showcasing to SIU, that we got a fill on the number of hours, per semester??? Pressure build up or relieving??? Child’s play!! Answer us boss.

While doing the suryanamaskar almost to 20 times, Midhun felt a Hrithik Roshan in lakshya, not with the 6 packs, but felt the intensity of a military punishment.

4. Tell / Do something to your parents which you haven’t done.

Midhun’s conversation

Midhun: Hello, daddy, I love you, mom, brother and all.

Dad: (Pause)

The following is what is going through dad’s head

Have I committed mistake a in life by sending my son to Fungiosis?!!
How many psychological problems, from screening to screaming!!
Are these people making my son insane or is he automatically so? Or is he contemplating suicide? A 100 more thoughts makes dad stressed, while trying to keep Midhun stress free.

M: Daddy, honestly you all were so good to me in life. I never could tell you that I love you so much.

D: (He decides to console) Don’t worry dear, everything is alright. Don’t commit suicide. A new girl will come in your life. We have a solution for everything.....

M: (Intercepts) No dad, nothing like that

D: Don’t tell lies. Is it money that u want? I will send it.

M: No dad…AOL ....

Dad doesn’t hear anything. He flies the next kingfisher to Pune.

M: Dad, nothing serious, it was a part of living…err… art of living… and since 90% of us have left it, its rechristened Art of leaving. We lost faith in the instructor once he too lost his cool. He taught us running race, ringa ringa roses, father had a donkey...not me… and lots more…

D: I too am quitting.(Curtain comes down)

CUT, BACK TO CLASSROOM.

Our instructor turns to his next prey, Mr. Venki - monk-i (monk=saint)

Instructor: Don’t get angry over anyone. Be calm.

Venki: what sir?

Instructor: Don’t get angry over anyone. Be calm

Venki: what sir??

Instructor: Can’t u hear me, you bunch of disrespectful people? SHUT UP & GET OUT.
(And a plastic smile added, as if to show that he is calm)

Venki: Don’t get angry over anyone. Be calm. :P

Instructor gets TNG. Quits AOL. PrateeQ Baba takes over along with Swami Ankit Nanda.

Enough of advice Doctor sir, these are the same things we had been hearing from the past many years, and let me reaffirm that we aren’t in KG, but in PG. If at all we are to change, the feeling should flow freely from within and can't be extruded, that too with four worthless pieces of paper called the attendance sheet.
Crumple the attendance sheet and see how many less would attend.

GOODBYE SIMC-AOL TEAM .I HAVE REACHED A POINT OF NO-RETURN. AM NOT EVEN ATTENDING REGULAR CLASSES NOW.
EVEN THE GRUESOME MUMBAI OFFICE & TRAVEL COULDN'T MAKE ME SO STRESSED & TIRED.

13 comments:

Blogged in said...

So much anger and frustration!!
very funny!! the AOL team should read it!!!

Thanks for voicing our opinion!! we could not have put it in a better way! :)

P. said...

Hear Hear !!

Midhun Murali said...

SO...'HUM LEFT THE ART OF LIVING'

Dear instructor saab, i love my parents, brother and friends to the maximum possible extent.

Kindness are not to be announced or declared in public (atleast for me) and it could not be measured with vernier calipers.


My lesson try to change people only if they are able to understand the cause otherwise the result will be diastrous. :(

Happiness: I can't affors more happiness. Just imagine despite of all these hectic schedules, bad food, leg pulling, footprints documentation i'm happy. Even more happiness means I'll be in asylum soon.

PS


Rejil, thanks again for coming up with the most relevant topic at the right time.

Akshay said...

Am writing this comment as an act of kindness no #341... The art of scheming I mean living propagated thoughts of coercive kindness magnified by generous helpings of retarding physical activity.
Today I quit AOL too, saw the sun set, drank a cup of coffee and dug into a leg of tender chicken. The art of living had made me quit the basic essentials of living. Vibrations of disbelief shook me out today and tremors of reality welcomed me back and I am back to usual business breathing life back into areas affected by the verbose dictats of another..

Keerat Kaur said...

Three cheers for Rejil for writing his best till date! Couldnt agree with you more man! The Art of Leaving left us more stressed than any assignment,test or Footprints could. Leaving AOL was the best decision I have taken after coming here-all my stresses and tensions have gone away and I dont have to deal with that plasticky smile and saccharine voice anymore. And no more so-hums..........Id rather do ho-hums in boring classes than so-hums in a room full of zombies in night suits sitting on bedsheets with patterns of flowers, cartoon characters or something out of natus class!

Anonymous said...

To differ... i am person who liked the AOL part. I hate godmen and stuff but it was a long needed excercise for my body...
And Rejil, how i wish you could have spoken of all these stresses (not AOL but the others) when you were given a chance to speak on stage. It was damn disappointing atleast for me to see diplomatic statements coming out of people who were chosen to represent us.

Rejil Krishnan said...

@Sajna
I never denigrated AOL, the original version, devoid of truckloads of advice and culminating in 90-120 minutes of breathing exercises.
On stage, is a different matter, the Director and Deputy Director knew what’s wrong. Moreover Rejil too is just one among you, as of now, minus any definite powers to do a surgery on the faculty and the rest. Else they should have been on stage for me to debate.
The naked truth is that everyone is selfish in their own rights!!! Answer me on why you didn’t even comment on the ‘Euthanasia” post, though after such a furore, hullabaloo?? You feared your future and your security, in case she reads and in case she continues to be your HOD. Isn’t? Why don’t you then think the same about me????
And blog is a personal space, unlike the stage space I shared that day. I have handled umpteen stages and I know well what to speak and when to speak. Sorry to say that, at this precise moment also, am just a student.
It would have been much better, if you could understand the subtle humor /sarcasm, when I said that we are left with the option of delving into the positives and foraying ahead in SIMC.

Anonymous said...

Rejil, finally the AOL has completed and now u can ask the feeback of the course o your friends those who have completed he course, its not so easy to comment to anything before experiencing it. I think you have lost a lot from this course

Rejil Krishnan said...

@Unknown
I have already done the basic course once. And am planning the advanced level after i reach home.
But yes, i accept that, i may have lost the fun involved when it's with friends. Still i couldn't get involved as u all did, cos i found it stressful(particularly the advice session, which was like another lecture) after those 5 hours of morning marathon classes.
BTW IF U HAD UR NAME WRITTEN AND COMMENTED, I WOULD HAVE DEEPLY APPRECIATED YOU.

Anonymous said...

@ Rejil

Okies u know very well y i dint write a comment for Euthanasia. It was not because i was scared. Instead it was because i had a part to play in that post. Or else how could u, who havent attended most of those lectures come up with the post? And more over y should i comment on something that i was a part of?
My comment was not to negate u. it was just a personal opinion. i hope u take it in that spirit.

Rejil Krishnan said...

I always took it in the right spirit n will always do so.. :)

Anonymous said...

i loved this one, rej!

Curl Canvas said...

brilliant!! nothing but the truth!