Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Conserving energy ! ! !

X: What's new at SIMC

Y: SIMC ? What is that ?

X: Arrreyyy... Symbiosis Institute of Media and Communication.

Y: Seems you aren’t updated. It's rechristened boss !

X: Ohh! I never knew. But as what?

Y: Now it's known in the industry as SIEM.

X: SIEM?!

Y: The SYMBIOSIS INSTITUTE OF EVENTFUL(L) MANAGEMENT, keeping in mind the number of events conducted every week.

X: Every week?

Y: Yes, at least twice in a month, we see the local newspapers carry snippets of some event.

X: Like?

Y: Module meet, Council meet, Media meet, Sponsorship meet, Sports meet, Creative meet, Mess meet, Footprints meet, Assignment meet, .ppt meet and so on and so forth.

X: Do they get a good crowd?

Y: Why not? Even the guy called Rahul roams around with an attendance sheet.

X: The mess chap?

Y: Yes !

X: (Mouth agape) But why?

Y: Areeey... Even dinner after the event is compulsory. Else TNG, off campus, off placement, suspension!

X: How caring yaar! I envy you. I too should have been in SIMC. Btw what is this off campus rule like?

Y: It's a super rule, where the student is told to be off the residential campus for some indiscipline, while his parents are kept in the dark. No one from the committee even enquires whether the student has a local guardian, where he/she is from? How safe she will be off campus? No one even thinks about what the consequences are if she goes all alone to the city to stay? Is it in some hotel she is put up for the week mentioned? What security does she get outside the protective wings of the campus administrator? The rule remains as blank or as bald as the DISCO dancers head, while the parents are oblivious of the whereabouts of their ward ! They believe that their kid is safe in a residential campus like in other better residential campuses !

X:DISCO dancer?

Y:Areeeey.. the DISciplinary COmmittee head ! From next week onwards, I have heard that there will be attendance even at the coffee shop, stationery shop, canteen, saloon etc.

X: (Mouth and eyes wide open now) But why?

Y: Symbiosis follows the principle of Vasudhaiva Kudumbakam, an umbrella under which all currencies... errrr... students come together.

X: The global bank? (Mouth, nose, eyes wide open)

Y: Not exactly, something similar though with the currencies, but in translation it’s a Global village!

X: Oops ! But getting back to what we were discussing…attendance in the shops!?

Y: Listen, the word ‘Symbiosis’ itself means co-existence between diverse organisms in which each may benefit from the other. Exclude the students and their parents here and it is perfect.

X: So, the shopkeeper benefits from the student and the student from the shopkeeper. Am I getting a gist of the business model?

Y: Yes, yes. It's simply great. You are a fast learner. Hear this too! We get our "Masters" in Business Administration from the "Masters" of business administration.

X: Lucky souls! You pay to SNAP every tie you had in life and be on the hilltop cut off from culture and civilisation. By the way what was the event for the week?

Y: Today was "Environment Sustainability & Energy conservation". We had it in full bright light, artificially lit with just 74 bulbs in the auditorium itself.

X: Just 74??? ! ! ! It’s a good number for an auditorium you have.

Y: Yes, 32 in one chandelier of bulbs and 32 in another added to 10 side wall lights!

X: And they spoke of saving energy?

Y: As you too know, the world just blabbers in forums and not a single speaker voiced his concern on the energy being wasted right in front of him/her.

X: When irony and hypocrisy rules the world, who cares for a small seminar in some remote corner of the world ? Hope they learn that 'Charity begins at home'

(A security appears from nowhere)

Security to X: You are in Pink shirt. As per the college rules, only girls are allowed to use pink color. Give me your identity card. Strict actions will be taken against you.

X: Hello, am not a student of this campus.

Security to X: Then, you must wear only light and dark green combination dress, in sync with the pollution free campus rule.

PHEWWWWW....

Y interferes: Please bhaiyya, pardon just for now. We are leaving the campus premises now.

Y to X: Btw we also are having a new rule coming up regarding the uniforms! You must not wear briefs when you are in the academic premises.

X: But ! But ! Y !

Y: Someone told the university rules committee that SIMC faculty gives briefs in every class. To avoid such properties from being taken home, the security is strictly told to check everyone before he leaves the campus and before entering the premises, along with the ID card. To avoid any confusions between his own brief and the colleges brief, students are strictly told not to wear briefs!!!

X: My gwaaaaaaaad ! ! ! (& the guest slips into a BRIEF coma.)

Wishing all the best to Symbiosis. Khuda Haafiz!

5 comments:

RB said...

I can't wait for DAM, FOC, and their corollaries!

Naman Saraiya said...

Superb.
Mr. President, you never fail to surprise and entertain us.

Deepali said...

Global Bank. We (mis)understand your world.

akshay said...

commenting since you said its mandatory..... : x

theglobalindian said...

The brief was the most detailed one! And the best one!